As we sat outside the Starbucks drinking coffee, we started talking about death. Were we afraid? What did we think was going to happen? And strangely enough, it was that conversation that led me to reflect on my 26th birthday on Saturday.
I thought back to my near-death experience, one I'll never forget. I'm sure I've had other near-death experiences that I wasn't aware of.....maybe the bus to La Paz going through the Andes almost got too close to the cliff, maybe I narrowly missed being in a car accident one day, maybe...well, I'll never know. But the one I do know and do remember occurred as I was swimming in the ocean one summer afternoon. With no one around me, with the lifeguards looking the other way, I got stuck in a rip current. I had never been in one before and had no idea what to do. I fought, swimming with all my might but I kept drifting away and away from the shore. My throat muscles tightened and I couldn't scream. My muscles grew exhausted and no one was there to witness. I was terrified but at one point, I thought "well, if this is how I have to die...." and resigned myself to it and the pure exhaustion led me to sink. Less than a few seconds later, a stranger pulled me out of the water and onto the shore.
It seems strange to reflect on death, upon turning 26, such a young age. But I've seen too much to not reflect on it. I have no idea when I will die. None of us do, really. But I can truly say that if I were to die tomorrow, I would die happy. Grateful to God for the life I've led.
It overwhelms me...the plans God had for me from the beginning, before I could even write my name, before I could even slightly imagine where God would take me. I never would have imagined that I would became fluent in Spanish and become a missionary, that I would join a religious community, that I would be living in Georgia. I never would have imagined seeing the things that I've seen - families living without running water both here and abroad, families torn apart because of deportation, an abused girl without a finger, a 50 year old man aged to 80 because of work in the mines, kids on the brink of suicide, kids having kids, etc. Or the people I would meet - unlikely people that would turn into wonderful friends, life teachers, children that would become like little siblings, Sisters with a capital "S" that would become like sisters with a lowercase "s".
When we think of life as a journey rather than the here-and-now, life becomes something amazing, something truly marvelous. We can turn back and then think “Where has God led me? What has He allowed me to see, to experience, to meet?”
That isn't to say that life is perfect or that I am perfect, because neither is true. I know that sometimes I have not lived up to what God wanted of me - I turned the other way from doing the right thing or going the right way. But to Him, as I grow another year older, I couldn't say anything less than "Oh, my God....thank you". Thank you for these 26 years. I'm not sure how many more I have left to live, but know that I am grateful and hope always to live for You, serving You in the person of the poor.
That isn't to say that life is perfect or that I am perfect, because neither is true. I know that sometimes I have not lived up to what God wanted of me - I turned the other way from doing the right thing or going the right way. But to Him, as I grow another year older, I couldn't say anything less than "Oh, my God....thank you". Thank you for these 26 years. I'm not sure how many more I have left to live, but know that I am grateful and hope always to live for You, serving You in the person of the poor.
Tratto da: www.versolanuovacreazione.it
ReplyDelete“Carissimi figli, conosco i vostri cuori e i vostri affanni. Conosco i desideri, gli ostacoli, le vostre domande profonde. Nulla mi è nascosto, davanti ai miei occhi scorrono il bene e il male che sono parte della vostra vita. Vi conosco ad uno ad uno, perché sono io che vi ho dato la vita. IO SONO LA VITA. Non troverete vita all’infuori di me, ne speranza e tanto meno amore. Voi cercate tante cose invece di cercare me per questo non trovate la pace, perché raramente trovate me. Vi ho detto che chi cerca trova (Lc 11, 9-13). Ma cosa dovete cercare? Non la soluzione ai vostri problemi, alle vostre ansie e alle malattie. Quello che dovete cercare è la mia vita in voi. Donandovi la vita, vi ho donato me stesso ed il mio spirito, vi ho rivelato il volto del Padre mio e vostro. Ho posto in ciascuno di voi la scintilla della vita divina, che è il seme della vostra esistenza. In esso c’è tutto ciò che vi occorre per affrontare la vita. Vi ho donato L’INTELLIGENZA la FORZA e L’AMORE per affrontare il vostro cammino. Con il mio sacrificio ho tolto la vergogna dal vostro volto, perché avete peccato contro il padre mio. Col mio sangue ho lavato le vostre brutture, per farvi comparire davanti al trono divino come creature nuove e redente. Vi ho rivestito delle vesti più preziose. Ho creato per voi le cose più belle, perché il vostro cuore gioisse guardando le meraviglie del creato. Nonostante questo pochi di voi sono felici e molti, troppi, non sanno che farsene di me e della mia vita; Scelgono il nemico, Satana che con astuzia e odio li seduce, fino a togliere loro ogni dignità . Ci sono tanti modi per consegnarsi al nemico, il più subdolo è quello di voler soddisfare se stessi, convinti che questi sia un bene, per il solo fatto che così fanno tutti, e che così la pensa il mondo. Il successo, il potere, la carriera, il denaro, i beni materiali, una bella casa, le vacanze, e altro ancora; tutto questo sta in cima ai vostri pensieri. Pur di ottenerlo, siete capaci di tradire, rubare, uccidere, ed uccidete in tanti modi, anche con uno sguardo o con una parola. E mentre cercate tutte queste cose, vi dimenticate di vivere. Perché la vita che voi sognate non è la vita, è un surrogato della vita. La vita vera non è al di fuori di voi, ma è dentro di voi. ”
Dio Vi Benedica